Coupons! Save!
I marched in the house with a gift for James, “I got you some hand-mitts for the grill,” I handed them over. “A pair.”
“Ah, yeah, I needed those.” He stuck one on his right hand, but turned the other around in his hands. “Why’d you get two rights?” he asked.
“Whadayamean?”
“They’re both right-handed gloves.” He held them up in front for me to see. Clearly, only one fit.
I looked from him to them, from them back to him. “Turn one upside down.” He turned it over and put it on upside down. “Left. Right. See?” I smiled.
“That makes all the batting on the top side of the left mitt.” He complained.
“I suppose if we had to, we could each wear one and work together.” I said.
“Yeah, I could pick up one side of the hot pan with my right hand and you could pick up the other side with your right hand and we can march side by side into the house with a fiery hot pan between us. And if we have to fling hamburgers, we can . . .”
I shrugged. “They were on sale. I had a coupon.”
He couldn’t help saying it again, “I hope you never have a coupon for charm snakes, or a Gila monster. I, I, I just don’t think I could. . .”
I don’t shop a lot, but I love to run across a good deal. James has never told me what not to buy, but he doesn’t use everything I’ve brought him. Like, I bought him this great smelling aftershave. Just last week, my nose wrinkled half in two. I asked what aftershave he’d just put on. He pointed to the stuff I’d bought. “But that stuff stinks!” I told him. “Throw it away, it’s rancid.”
Not every coupon works. Still, how do I know I won’t run into somebody who needs something just like the two right-handed gloves, for instance? Wouldn’t they be surprised! Wouldn’t they think I’d shopped the ends of the earth and found something that fit them exactly?
I mean, I know a woman who has two different size feet, of a considerable difference. She has to buy two sets of the same shoe to make a pair. Now what if she had a buy one-get one free coupon. Would that not make total sense to buy your shoes when you have a buy-one-get-one-free coupon? Of course, that’s not like having two left feet, but it would apply the same.
A shoe salesman discovered her one day and matched her with another customer who had the same problem, but reversed. No kidding! So when one or the other lady bought a pair of shoes, the salesman called up the other of them who had the opposite feet-difference problem and they bought the other set. Wow. What a salesman.
Maybe takes a strange kind of savvy–coupon shopping. More than anything, I’m challenged by it. Really, I’m pretty conservative when it comes to using coupons. I don’t save just any ‘ol coupon–only the products I use faithfully. Or there may be an occasional product I want to try–I buy it once, and if it’s no good, I don’t bother with that coupon ever again, like the after shave. Phew.
Last week James questioned me thoroughly about a coupon that came in the mail for 60% off a watch. He’s even thinking he might need another. See what I mean? Proof positive that the deals are out there.
What’s your latest coupon buy?